December 26, 2017

Merry Christmas To Us

Our 6th Christmas without him.
My boys have become young men. 
Old memories from holidays past remain.
Beautiful memories with him.
Brutal memories from those first years without him.
New traditions have been created.
Simple and sweet.
Time has given us the gift to create them.

Time has given us the gift to forget.
Forget the overwhelming and suffocating pain.

Time has given us the gift to honor the past.
Enjoy the present.
Have hope for the future.
Celebrate who we have become.

It hasn't been easy.
It still isn't some days.
You learn to live with the pain.
You learn to hold tight to the good.
To the laughter.
To the moments where you feel whole.
To the people who love you.
To the people you love.
To honesty and truth.

We are no longer broken.
The three of us have healed.

A Christmas card.
A Christmas letter.
A Christmas Eve church service.

I was finally able to do it this year.
I enjoyed it.
Yes I cried but tears of joy.
Joy I haven't felt in years.
Hope in my heart.

A Merry Christmas it was.

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